Saturday, March 10, 2007

Blogger Baiting

It is a well known fact that certain members of the blogging species have, and I will abandon my usual tasteful linguistic delicacy here, a red-hot two foot pole up their asses. Simply put, they take themselves way too seriously, taking offence at the smallest of deviations from their dangerously high levels of political correctness, which usually come at the expense of factual correctness.

So to remedy that, I occasionally do the following. The world might not be a better place for it, but I sure as fuck get my kicks and giggles out of it.

I leave random, irrelevant, irreverent comments on their blogs, often, just to see how they'll react. (Oh no, not on YOUR blog, I'd never do that!)

Come on, admit it, we've all trolled! There's no shame in it. It's how I started my blogging career, as, uh, some people on my blogroll might claim.

Anyway, the ones that respond with humor get my instant respect. Many, you'll find, are not intelligent enough to handle curveballs.

Ve are the robots.
Ve are the robots.
Ve protzess informatzion uberlinearly.
Ve cannot protzess your reqvest.
Ve cannot protzess your reqvest.
Ve cannot protzess your reqvest.

And on a completely unrelated note, I need a man right now. A man who will lovingly gaze into my eyes, grab me by the hair, and softly whisper the words 'te quiero, puta!' in my ears. The boyfriend (fool*!) ain't doing that because he isn't frikkin' here. The man I made out with one drunken night who is now living in my apartment for a week ain't doing it either, because his Muttersprache is more Teutonic than Latinic.

Must be the romantic in me, what else do you expect from the girl who goes by the oh-so-adorable-type-1-and-2-diabetes-inducing cutesypie blogging name of Raindrop?

*He ought to be a little less complacent about this situation, in my opinion. DrunkenNightBoy isn't cute, but he's easily accessible, and he's been partially tried and tested. The boyfriend is not readily available. I may be super loyal and trustworthy, but that doesn't mean he can just go ahead and take my loyalty for granted! Like I said, fool!

Edit: Look to your right. Doesn't the woman in the picture have a seriously hot ass?

68 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, that's a seriously hot ass!

Szerelem said...

I've seriously never trolled. Maybe I should start?

Urban Bourbon Ninja said...

How immoral of you.

Renovatio said...

Wait, aren't we all trolling deep down inside?
And yes, that is in fact an excellent ass...

jerry said...

It sure is.

Drunken Master said...

Like I said on the previous post: Craigs List!

unforgiven said...

Not really, not enough volume.

Oh yeah, once you're done with the drunken guy, could you send him over, my girlfriend is also sorta not giving me enough time nowadays so.....

moonstruck maniac said...

yes, it indeed is a hot ass. (ne plu ne plah)

tetracyclops said...

agree with the ass thingie. Star movies is showing all the bond movies these days, but they start so late at night (11 pm in India) that I end up ditching it for Cheaters or Matchmakers! ;-)

by the way, the type 1/2 diabetes first reminds me of the drug balaglitazone which should be in the market in 5 yrs (it wud also protect against obesity by the way), save urself till then!

and the other thing which it reminds me of is the vague chat names used by people when i was initially exposed to chat world. i recall names like sweetassugargirl, sweetnhornyguy, cutiepie and so on .. (dont read sweetassugargirl as sweet-ass-ugar-girl!)

WishfulThinker said...

Te quiero, te adoro, mi viiiiiiiiiiida!!!! :D And since you asked, thats a sexy but skinny ass!

TS said...

:) I love this space, for the attempted malice and TASTEFUL LINGUISTIC DELICACY.

-"because his Muttersprache is more Teutonic than Latinic. "
(Err... could you put that in ENGLISH?)

- Anonymous comments? Not.

- And darling if boyfriends KNEW what to frikkin' do when, wouldn't you be floating in Wonderland (and missing out on other pretty/accessible boys in the process?)

boyfriend said...

Ive sort always found you Fugly. more so these days. but i wasnt getting any then, and so...

jerry said...

Yep, such bloggers are full of them...

Raindrop said...

anonymous, glad you agree.

Szerelem, there's a lot to be said for trolling. It's best done non-anonymously. :)

Ninja Turtle, there's a lot to be said for immorality. I won't say it. :)

Renovatio, another man of taste. Yes, we're all trolls deep within. My inner troll is very vocal.


Jerry, and another man of taste. And more proof that men are cavemen. :)

Unforgiven, I'm not doing ANYTHING with the dude.

moonstruck, more proof that men are cavemen. *sigh*

iz said...

I NEVER TROLL. In the words of one blogger: 'I always put my balls to my name."

Silvara said...

*drool* that's a very nice ass....wishing one day mine looks that but not holding my breath :(

Trolling sounds fun...maybe I'll take it up alleviate the boy-free boredom I'm in right now

dodo said...

Hehe... you said "red-hot two foot pole", and your blog is so red :). And I wonder what kind of usability studies the 'hot-ass woman' is doing with that 'Gun With A Long Silencer' ;).

And Raindrop, for the love of all the freaks in the sky, when are you going to stop Bono's Red campaign on your blog?

Scritch said...

poor boyfriend. he just can't win.
if he wasn't worried before he sure will be sweating now.

Scritch said...

i also thought for a minute that poor bf had been given the boot by randomnightguy
i should stop trolling and get back to making my fabulous fantastic all amazing wounderkind website
in fact thats what I'm going to call it from now on.

Raindrop said...

Tetra, full points to you, you're a non-caveman. You actually read the post!

TS, yup. I like my trolling attributed to me, so I'm never an anonymous troller either. Muttersprache=muzzer tung. :)

Boyfriend, and so..? Fugly with a capital F, damn, that's such a huge insult that it's actually a compliment!:)

Jerry, indeed.

Iz, I put my balls to my name and still troll. Anything I do when I'm signed into blogger is basically just trolling.

Silvara, yay! You're in luck because I'm recruiting trollers here. Boyfriend-free and fiance-full?

Dodo, stop whining about the color of my blog, little girl.

Scritch, stop feeling sorry for the boyfriend. I'M the one who deserves your pity, not him! And what website? Your blog, by the way, is awesomely hilarious. Your website is much awaited.

Raccoon said...

'te quiero, puta', said Softly in yr ears? I really cant picturise/imagine that!! To have most effect, should'nt it be said like roughly or smthing?

and yeah, I often post irreverant comments around too, so I know how much pleasure that entails:-D

ps: thanks for the comment on my blog - I now have another point to parade to sceptics, thanks to you:)

WishfulThinker said...

Oi! I'm back! :)

nevermind said...

Go for the Teuton, Raindrop. You'll never know unless you find out:) Sensible, no?

nevermind said...

And I once got into an anonymous slanging match with one weird Sigmund, Carl and Alfred, who then did a series of posts in my honour, which I then crassly dismembered. This was very nice.

Zeppelin said...

Hi Rainbow! new to your blog..came through Izzy's.. seriously kick-ass writing! have become addicted now..and have blogrolled you..

and OHHHHH yes! H - O - T ass! :)

cheers!

TS said...

Next Post. Please.

Szerelem said...

disappeared much?

Dupa Jasia said...

.. .. ...

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WishfulThinker said...

Dudette? Like wherefore the f*** art thou? You can't do a WT on WT!

alex said...

.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ...

jerry said...

You're not writing you know.

Renovatio said...

Seems Alex is trying to make up for it.

The Dude said...

Hey raindrop,
ive been absent from your blog(s) for a long while and come back to find a great post and that youve disappeared!? what gives?
I agree on the contempt for all the bloggers with buttholes that are so tight they could crack a walnut...
... and since you asked, that is one hot ass...ass!
cheers...

the wannabe indian punkster said...

Will you come out of hibernation, please?

*prod*

nevermind said...

Raindrop? See, we love you. Come back:-)

soundsnsilence said...

WOH! Loved your post!

burf said...

nice background colour

WishfulThinker said...

Hey man, all is well with you I hope! :)

Parul said...

yepp!!!
the ass is hot!
please keep your blog hot too and update :P

Arthur Quiller Couch said...

Rest in Pieces?

nevermind said...

Jagshemash, Mexican, trust you to be pragmatic:) You can get drunk and still blog, y'know. In fact, that might be quite interesting. Have fun.

Sophie said...

LINGUISTIC DELICACY...where is it?...u seem to be sleeping for a while?

wake up...and about the ass....ur blogs hits more....the color..aweee!

That Armchair Philosopher said...

To echo everyone out there ... where did you ever vanish off too?

you ARE coming back, right?

Retrosexual said...

It just require a reasonable hand-eye co-ordination to handle curveballs... and in this case just a little bit of comfort in one's skin. Non?

Zuma's colored balls said...

y may i ask, i find this deliciously readable blog and it seems the last post was an even year ago?! te quiero puta , come back!(is it ok if people other than your boyfriend say it, sans tugging hair i mean?)

MUS said...

Fuck, the ass is so fucking inviting!!!

MUS said...

And your blog is so delightful.

Mystique Wanderer said...

somewhere i get the feel u must've been a frequent visitor on keshi's blog...the ones she keeps re bitching abt without calling out their names :P

and ure like barney....from how i met your mother...talking of romance for one...and sleeping wid 'men' in ure case on the other...

infact u sound so like another frnd of mine...though she doesnt have the bond class...she's more of a man in a woman's body :P

funnily though barney and bond are supposed to be my alter egos :P

ray said...

Hi,

I was reading ur blog posts and found some of them to be very good.. u write well.. Why don't you popularize it more.. ur posts on ur blog ‘Sheer Vogon Poetry
’ took my particular attention as some of them are interesting topics of mine too;

BTW I help out some ex-IIMA guys who with another batch mate run www.rambhai.com where you can post links to your most loved blog-posts. Rambhai was the chaiwala at IIMA and it is a site where users can themselves share links to blog posts etc and other can find and vote on them. The best make it to the homepage!

This way you can reach out to rambhai readers some of whom could become your ardent fans.. who knows.. :)

Cheers,
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freudian slip said...

bleaurgh, you suck, your blogs too bright, and miss moneypenny was secretly an s&m officianado.

youve been trolled.

hi BTW

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